When You've Spent the Day Writing 22,800 words of Corporate Bullshit, it's best to let other people do the talking at night

1: For When They Ask You Why. Again.

“I have always accrued status and validation through my indiscretions ……………………  We all need something to help us unwind at the end of the day. You might hav.e a glass of wine, or a joint, or a big, delicious blob of heroin to silence your silly brainbox of its witterings, but there has to be some form of punctuation, or life just seems utterly relentless.”

-         Russell Brand in My Booky Wook (dear god, why did he call it that?)

Well, at least Russell Brand gets it. Unfortunately, you are not the child of Russell Brand. And even if you were, there’s no guarantee that you would be any less disappointing.

But at least, Russell Brand gets it. You should be worried.

And by you, I mean me. Obviously.

2: For When You’re Sick and Tired of Every Living Soul

Allen Ginsberg shot his famous friends. With a camera, that is. Here’s one of Jack Kerouac, taken after his visit to Ginsberg & Burrough’s Lower East Side, Manhattan pad in the fall of 1953. Ginsberg refers to Kerouac’s expression here as “Dostoyevsky mad-face or Russian basso be-bop Om”.

3: For When Somebody Tells You that Women who wear make-up at work get promoted faster than their bare-faced peers.

And also, for when somebody asks you what the hell is that entitled little, fuckwad of a receptionist is thinking half the time.

Of course, in my case, it would just be “Give Us Money.” Uhm, yeah, that’s it.